November is for food: History is Hungry

So every year Americans all over the world get together for a big ol meal called thanksgiving, every kid in this great country learned that thanksgiving went down a little something like this:

See, these religious people left England in hopes of finding a place that they could get down with the worshiping the way they want to, and not have to worry about being hated on by the legion of haters in the “Old World”. 

So they came to the “New World”

Now, when you think about it, the world was new, but it was new like a used car, you know new to you, but not to anyone else…you know cause someone else already owned it or in the case of the Native Americans already lived there.

Anyway.

So, the settlers show up all happy and what not, but they don’t know jack squat about anything in terms of hunting, fishing, farming, or surviving in this “New” world that really should be called the “Previously Lived in World”, and the cool as hell Native Americans were all like

“Ay! Check it, we bout to hook yall up”

See, the Native Americans didn’t hate the players or the game, and so what they did was hook them up with all the buffalo, corn, fish, etc they could eat, and that is how thanksgiving happened and the Native Americans were our friends.

We all learned that, but that’s not quite how it happened though.

See, this holiday just like everything else has gone corporate. November is all about food, shopping, and not burning your house down trying to fry a turkey in the garage.  If the numbers of people that are camping out in front of best buy, Target, and Wal-Mart just to fight with each other over a flat screen TV were to donate the same amount of time to a soup kitchen, homeless shelter, or after school center, the possibilities are endless as to the amount of the Lords work that could be done.

The Pilgrims thought they were doing the Lords work too, see instead of viewing the Natives as a real people they viewed them as a tool of the lord put on the land to guide them just long enough to get screwed in the RAWEST deal on planet earth. Squanto, the Native American that is credited with teaching the invaders of to live off the land, was actually kidnapped as a child and bought and traded as a slave and somehow he managed to get back the “New” world or “Home” as he would call it, just to find out that his people have been slaughtered by the very same people that he helped.

Ain’t that bout a bitch!

At least there is turkey right?  Right now kids in school are putting on thanksgiving plays that are probably reinforcing so many negative stereotypes that the inside joke that they are letting the black kid be the lead pilgrim, who will no doubt get to be Martin Luther King jr in February, gets over looked all the way over. 

Lets keep rowing this boat, Thanksgiving in the U.S. coincides with Columbus day. The day Christopher Columbus brought the first invading force to the “New” world. See, but that is political anyway, see Honest Abe came about and made Thanksgiving an official holiday (you know the one where we get holiday pay but not for MLK day…I’m just saying)and on that same day, he sent troops in to march against the Sioux Nation in Minnesota .

 Anyway, back in the day, anytime there was a huge slaughter of Indians a day of thanks giving was called to celebrate the destruction of the “savages” because that is what the religious zealots at the time believed. It got to the point to wear George Washington was like, “Damn we can’t be doing all this partying after we get it in on these Indians, we got a nation to build!!!!!” So he decided that they would have one big party to celebrate all the genocide.

So Native Americans get a two for one in November!

This is the short version.

Around Halloween, I saw someone’s facebook on the facebook that is inside of facebook talk about how she was happy it was raining on Halloween because that day celebrates the devil and anyone that new anything knew that.  So hopefully, everyone will take some time and learn a bit about what they are celebrating. If you really want to show how thankful you are this season doing something about it.

Volunteer at a shelter, give some can food items that you would actually eat and not the ones that have been sitting there for years to a can food drive, or go visit a nursing home and just sit with the people.  That way you would actually be celebrating thanksgiving the way it should be.

KenNitro Vs Bullying: I Am In The Solutions Business

“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”

                                                                                                -Friedrich Nietzsche

A friends facebook status on bullying, and from the responses of the parents all seem to think that teachers and administrators don’t seem to have a handle on the definition of a bully, much less the different types of bullying behavior. So what we end up having is a big ol cluster fuck of “Who is” and “What is” and “How is” going on, with everyone looking to place the blame and no one looking to find or create the solution.  Seriously a RICCO case and proving bullying takes about the same amount effort.

It’s aight though!

GET SOME!!!

KenNitro, full time awesome/Killer, part-time child behavior modification specialist, and strength based from my ten deadly toes to the tippy top of my AFRO, has the answer to the question:

How does my child deal with bullies?

Wait, before we even go into that, let me go ahead and put it out there, that I do not have any kids of my own, nor was I bullied as a kid, picked on yeah, but who wasn’t, but I am real live rock and roller who rolls with a wild bunch of like minded individuals that are quick go in, get it in, and defend our parking lot titles against any and all who want 100% of our attention.  By no means am I a bully, I am something much, much worse.

I’m an asshole.

They Came To Fight, We Came To
Turn The Volume Up!

If you want to do it the right way parents, it is going to be time consuming emotionally frustrating and I can’t promise it will even get the results you are looking for, but the children involved, parents, teachers, administrations will all know that you will not put up with some aspect of their job description interfering with the educational advancement of your college bound child. To be honest, this route does not guarantee victory, but it is the most honorable.

First is that when your child comes home and tells you that he/she is having issues with another kid, tell your kid to try to work it out through some sort of non-confrontational way. You have to do it in real life, and they might as well start learning now, and if that doesn’t work have your same kid tell the teacher what the deal is and hopefully the teacher will step in with the authority that the state has given them to teach kids and hold kids accountable to basic expectations in their classrooms. Now if that isn’t working, this is when the parents step in and ask for a conference with the teacher and principal and ask them open ended questions like, “So what is your solution to this issue we are having?” and “How do these disruptions effect your ability to teach, and what can my child do differently” If none of that works then I would suggest having a sit down with the other kids parents, and both parties can show their offspring how adults handle situations so they can have some positive behavior to emulate in the future.

If parents can say that they have done all of that, and kept their own egos in check during the whole process then you have given the universe all it ask in terms of karma’s repercussions, and if the results were not as you hoped, then an only then would I co-sign a child’s throwing hands with another at school.

The funny part is no parent wants to go this route. See what is going to happen is that everyone’s ego is going to get involved and the issue is going to go from kids not getting along to parents not getting along and then it is going to be an issue that has nothing to do with the kids and everything to do with the fact that the parents and administration can’t act like adults.

See now let me tell you something before we go any further, once you co-sign this there is no coming back. Whatever happens after that first punch is thrown; you by default are ok with it and anything else that comes from it. The cave entrance will have crumbled on you and the way out is the way through.

I am a pacifist, because I have the
option to be one!

So I am going to give you a KenNitro Anti-bully methodology that if done correctly will ensure that your child’s respect at school from their peers increases enough to be moved from the bully column to the “Leave me the fuck alone group”.

1.     1.  No Bluffing, this is always the first mistake. Once you get up out of your chair or take a stand there can be no hesitation only action.

2.     2.  Don’t pick up chairs or swing things like book bags, these items require too much commitment and without a proper follow-up, this will not go well for your child.

3.      3. A well placed sucker punch is much better than the aforementioned rules, the best time to sucker punch anyone is always when they are not looking, now if you want to utilize any of the aforementioned items in the second point, then fine. Following up the sucker punch with a chair shot is acceptable

4.      4. Fight as if losing never happens. Sometimes a war of attrition is exactly what needs to happen.

5.       5 .Make them bleed. If you go this route you can’t just beat the bully, you have to destroy the bully, that way they will remember what they are going to have to endure if they choose to continue this beef, and their friends will have to be willing to endure what their bully friends have if they decide to get into it.

6.      6.  Talk shit while you are doing it, this is for everyone else really. Once you remove the bully’s support system, it will no longer benefit the bully to continue to focus on you.

7.      7.  Go in on the bully’s friends (see rule 4), find the weakest one and beat the shit out of him for his support (see rule 5), then move up the ladder. As you do this, the bully’s lieutenant will realize that this war is not worth it and the bully is going to follow the advice of the lieutenant because his ego is not at stake.

The fact is, if you tell your child things like, “Handle your business” or “If someone gets in your face, you better not back down” or my personal favorite, “If you lose a fight at school, you are going to lose another one when you get home” Then good luck to you. Chances are, you are the type of parent that will also tell your child that you are not sending them to school to get into fights, but to learn. 

Don't you think that is just a little bit confusing?

If you think that the school isn’t going to do anything, then be prepared to support your child’s actions and if he/she does not follow the seven steps that I just outlined, then well they are going to fail, and by fail I mean get the crap beat out of them hard and often and if they succeed they will probably end up expelled from school, and you will only have yourself to blame mom and dad cause instead of modeling a behavior that will set a positive example of conflict resolution, you wanted to prove a point.

Victory without honor, is no victory at all.

November is for Food: OCCUPY OMG TACO!!!!

So this entire month everyone in the facebook universe has been filling their statuses  with what they are thankful for on a daily basis, and while I originally said that I would not do such a thing because after all November is really all about food, I find myself about tell you all what I am thankful for:

What I am thankful for are people that strive to give people better options to spend their food money on, I am thankful for local places that fill up my belly and give me a chance to give back to the local community all at once.

Best Taco's Ever!REAL(CLAP)TALK(CLAP)

I am thankful for OMG TACO.

Lets get right into it, OMG TACO is the best place to get a taco in ATLANTA, GA period. If you ain’t down with that, you need to be flying triangle.  What makes OMG TACO so amazing is how it somehow took these two culinary cultures and made one great taste.

Mexican food with Kim chi, do you even know what Kim chi is? Kim chi is fermented cabbage, and it is a staple of the Korean culture.  Without going to deep into it, Kim chi is the culinary equivalent to cornbread in the south, and have you ever had a Sunday dinner without cornbread?

Exactly!

Look, you may feel some sort of way about cabbage, cause to be perfectly honest, if I never ate cabbage in my entire life it would be too soon. I lived a year in Korea and managed to eat Kim chi only when I really, really, really, had too. So if some people out there are turned off to the aspect of cabbage on a taco I have some words of encouragement:

Build a Bridge and Get Right Over It!

Anyway, OMG TACO is a fusion of Korean and Mexican food and it will change your life as it relates to tacos for the better.  I suggest getting a short rib taco with the OMFG sauce as well as a calamari taco.  The spicy pork taco is super flavorful, but the short rib is easily the crowd favorite.  The atmosphere is super laid back with some classic hip hop tracks providing the background music and a staff that is as easy on the eyes as they are knowledgeable about what comes out the kitchen, and what comes out the kitchen, is nothing short of amazing.

Blake Bowman(left) and Jorge Segarra, pictured with first
eddtion Golf Bat.

If you are going to go to Atlanta, ask your Jesus phone how to get to OMG taco.  More than likely if you are outside the perimeter like myself, you are going to eat while you are there. Why eat at a place that is  in Atlanta and in your county way outside of 285? That makes about as much sense as a golf bat!

Why would you not want to try a new restaurant, comfort? Maybe cause you got a coupon? Maybe cause you just don’t want to trust a local restaurant because money is tight these days (I mean, we are in a recession) and I can understand going for the sure thing in most situations, but OMG TACO is not most situations.  What you have in OMG TACO is a chance to experience a new trend in food, eat some really good food, and not break your wallet at the same time.  I can honestly say that whenever I drive to Atlanta, I am saving room for OMG TACO and it is a non-negotiable portion of the evening.

Life Changer right here!

Did I tell you about the fries? OMG fries probably do not get the attention they deserve and it is OMG TACO’s own fault really.  See when you go in, you go in on the fact that you want taco’s not fries, so you get tacos and you miss out on the complete and utter awesomeness which is OMG FRIES.

Imagine French fries(or freedom fries if you lean that way) covered in any of the delicious taco fillings(the short rib is the crowd favorite), drippin with the OMG custom SAAAUUUCCEEE, and covered with cheese.

November is for FOOD, break out of your comfort zone. 

November is for Food: Eating is Serious Business

Last week, I talked about how this November everyone is talking about what they are thankful for, I am still under the impression that November is not about thanksgiving at all, but that is a blog for a different week(Soon, like on thanksgiving).

Continuing on from last week's blog about local food vs corporate food on during this gov't mandated month of gluttony I am once again trying to educate the masses on what to eat vs what not to eat and why. Which brings me to the topic of the day

Mexican food

The food or the people one or
the other is coming over the fence

In America we speak ENGLISH!
(No Accents)

Well lets be honest, most of the american people couldn't tell the difference between a Nicaraguan restaurant vs a Mexican restaurant any way, and in the right light and Asian from a Mexican. So we take that kind of indifference and mix it with a society's desire to have everything fast, plus sprinkle a little bigotry and passive racial discrimintory policys then BOOM!!!!! Yo queiro Taco Bell.  Seriously, with all the B.S. about building a fence with Razor Wire, and flying sharks with lasers patrolling said fence with the right side of our political spectrum feeding the sharks the leftover souls of innocent children that they just ate to the sharks we forget about one of the most awesome creations on earth.

Mexican Food

But for some reason, people seem to eat taco bell like is all good.  I mean most of the stuff at that place really can't be considered food anyway.  Then you have Moe's. Don't get me wrong, I like Moe's a lot actually, from the names of the burritos and the cheese dip, all the way down to how they get down with like five different kinds of salsa for the chips, but they are still apart of the problem, and Chipotle! Don't even get me started.

Actually, let me go in on these folks coach!

You can get down or you can lay down
but if you lay down, you gonna stay
Down!

How you gonna make burritos and tacos gourmet? I tell you how they do it, they use some better foil and claim that they are using fresh ingredients, but in reality you have a guy who went to school for culinary arts traveled a bit made it to san francisco and saw what the local Latino populous was hustling and after talking daddy into bank rolling his dream of raping a culture for their food and then getting even more money from "The Clown" we now have this thing called "Fast Casual Dining"

And folks actually go and eat there.

Meanwhile in every town, there are a number of Local spots that get enough love from the the community, but it is not cause of the food, it's the margarita specials.

In Carrollton, GA you got two spots that come to mind The Border and The Lazy Donkey(I know right)and to tell you the truth the food is off the chain and I have never had a bad experience at either one of these restaurants, but we are going to get a little deeper. I'm not focusing on these spots because they do just fine without a plug from KenNitro.com.

I'm talking about the *Mexican grill, it's a small spot that has big portions and a seriously family atmosphere well I can't say if it has a family atmosphere, whenever I go I am hanging with my peeps and we are a rowdy bunch, now if a family were to come there I am sure the atmosphere would be great for it.but the parking lot is never full, and that is a bad thing, oh and the best part.

It's not expensive!

What do you do? If you are a small business you can't expect people to go and try something new unless you do something completely out of the ordinary like have people eating on beds, Ipads for menus, a live sacrifice or something else that will make people swear that the food is something special, when there is nothing special about it.

See, as I have said before you have already have allocated those dinner dollars so why don't you spend them on a local restaurant that still puts their heart and soul into the food you eat? I am sure there is someplace local that you have not been to in a while, and you should fix that.  Like I said before, we try to encourage our kids to try new things.

Lead by example.

*I don't have a good picture of the restaurant cause I wish I had time to just be running around taking pictures of stuff

KenNitro vs The Facility: All things considered

Today was like any other day on the island. I stood with one of the other holders of the word and spoke about the world outside of the island, the weather was a bit colder than what I was comfortable with.  As my equal and I spoke about the things we do our children stand close, not so close to be told to go and be amongst themselves, but close enough to be seen and not heard.

Those are my favorites.

I noticed in the distance that one of the footballs was off in the distance; I decided to see how my young charges have improved on their interactions with one another and critical thinking. So I said to them, whoever can bring that football first, I will give a bonus point. Before I could say go, one of my wayward youths took into consideration that everything has a point and he did something amazing.

He thought it through!

He stops everyone and says, “Look if we all go and get it and bring it back we can all receive a bonus point” I actually held back a smile because he is applying a lesson that I taught in a group several months ago. Everyone seemed to be in agreement with his plan.

So I said, “Go”

With that, these kids took off like the wind, these are the good kids so seeing them run in any direction does not alarm anyone, but we still pay very close attention. I would like to tell you that they each took turns carrying the ball equally sharing in the work load so that they may equally share in the ever elusive bonus point from Mr. Ken A.K.A Dr. Doom-Megatron , but that is not what happened.

Instead the faster kid got out ahead of everyone scooped up the ball and ran it back to me with a smile on his face. As his peers made it back to me, they were all upset. I asked him, “Why would you do that, everyone could have gotten a bonus point if you all would have worked together?”

His response was probably the most honest thing I have heard anyone say in several months.

“I know we all could have gotten a bonus point, but I didn’t want them to have a bonus point”

In that above statement lies a deeper truth.

OCCUPY THE FACILITY!!!!

I’m just kidding, but if you are serious though, I mean, we can do it…I’m just saying.  Working at the facility is not a job, it’s an adventure.   The work at the facility is not work, but art and must be practiced every day. I say all this to say, and this may be the first time that I say, “I think I speak for everyone “when I say,  I need a day off!

No, I am not talking about the two days that I get off every week, but I need like a day off that I don’t normally get off.  The truth is I work in a very “Reactive” environment, but what is confusing is that being proactive really just creates more work for an already over worked group of individuals.  So scheduling is essentially a love /hate relationship. Geez, relationships are never fair though, and when you do what you are suppose to and you do(put the time that you want off in when you are suppose to do) and you do not get the results(the time you asked off).

You tend to feel some sort of way about it.

Did I tell you about my most recent waffle house adventure?

Ok, see me and a friend were getting down on that waffle house awesomeness, I was enjoying my usual waffle and bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich with my hash browns covered and chunked, and they well I can’t really remember what they had but they enjoyed it none the less and we got spoke with our waitress (Wait, is it still ok to call them that? Whatever) and we talked about how it is hard out there for everybody and she went on to talk about how she had been working for the Waffle House for thirty years.

He saved your soul, so he can feed
it to the DINO's!!!!

WHAT!!!! SWEET JESUS RIDING A DINOSAUR did you say you have been working at the waffle house for 30 years!!!!

I felt really bad about bitching about my job for the length of time that I did, when this poor woman has been hustling waffles to every drunk, hipster, family, pre and post party going from the Regan Era to Obama. I should be happy to have my job cause well I don’t get paid as much as I feel like I am worth but hey I’m not grinding this waffle house gig ya know?

See that is where I fucked up, time for my favorite part of blogs

PUT YOU UP ON SOME GAME!!!!!

Waffle house servers make like 7.25 cent and hour waiting tables. Most servers at the corporate cafeterias that most of you all spend your dinner dollars at make 2.13 cent and hour. Now no one goes to the Waffle House and spends less than 10 bucks and if you tip based on the fact that you were not raised by wolves you probably throw down 20% like a BOSS!!!

This is what happens to your
brain when you realize that the WaHo
folks are living the dream, and you aren't

So 7.25 plus 2.00 bucks, but wait, I had a friend with me, so we have to add another 2.00. So right now we have 7.25+4.00 so now she is making 11.25 an hour and that was the one table we were at. Let’s say she had 3 tables of 2 people all spending 10 dollars apiece and dropping the 20% LIKE A BOSS! That is 7.25 + 12 dollars so that comes out to be 19.25 an hour.  And she went on to talk about how getting time off is never an issue because for some known unknown waffle house folks have figured out how to make the most people happy most of the time.

I was mad all over again.

The source of the Strength

You couldn't ask for a
better handbook

If you keep you with my facebook statuses, you may see a lot of statuses that say “Strength Based on Deck” or something of that sort. Well, you may find it hard to believe but the strength based program is a living, breathing, document, similar to the constitution in the fact that it can be changed and adjusted as needed, but what I want to talk about is the secret to the strength of the strength based program. It is really quite simple these are the two words that hold the most weight at the facility:

                      Rewards and Consequences

The State will take everything
away from you, and we will take the rest

It’s pretty simple really, kids that do good get rewarded for their efforts and kids that do not do good do not get rewarded. Now the system starts to shake when there are kids doing good and they have to wait on the reward, a shake is not so bad though, kids need to learn that everything in life does not happen like clockwork and I do strategically promise and not deliver. The system breaks when there are no rewards to be earned and those that do not do good receive the attention from staff. What happens is the system is turned on its head, the bad continue to be bad and flourish in the attention they receive from Us, and the good ones fall into that behavior because they are confused as to why they are doing good in the first place.

So the new challenge is turning what should have never been upside down in the first place back to its original place and keeping it there, but the answer is right in front of you.

                                                                     Consequences and Rewards  
 

You can get with this

Actually, it is all about holding yourself accountable to the islands inhabitants, support for your team, and unity in the face of adversity. 

On the island, we had to put the pyramid in its proper place and once we did everyone and I mean everyone was on the same page as to what direction the sun comes up, and that page simply said, “Whatever direction I say it

or you can get with that

does”Real(clap)Talk(Clap).

Once the islanders understood that those that make the right decisions will be rewarded and those that made the wrong one would not be, and that whatever the reward was going to be was going to happen, regardless of how those that normally make the wrong decisions act, the kids understand is that the best choice is to follow the lead of those in charge otherwise nobody wins.

November is for Food

So I am noticing that on facebook everyone seems to be on this whole November being “30 days” of thankfulness and posting something that they are thankful for every day of the month, to see just how hard it is when you get to the end of the month…

I’m not doing that at all.

Google is one update away from skynet

This blog is all about food and not what kind of food you eat or even how much you eat of it, it is about where you eat it.  See I don’t know any other way to say it, so I will just go on out and express myself the only way I know how to on this subject:

EVERY CORPORATE RESTAURANT SUCKS(except the Waffle House, that’s my shit right der!)

It’s true.

What does not suck are the number of local restaurants in your area that you don’t go to cause you would rather have applebees 2 for 20 b.s. It bothers me that it looks like damn Occupy Wallstreet outside of Longhorn steakhouse, Ruby Tuesdays, Applebee’s, O’charlies, and The Olive Garden.

When you have some seriously awesome local action as an option!

No caption Needed

For instance, in the great metropolitan city of Carrollton, GA there is the downtown square and on the square there is a restaurant called Plates.  Most people will hang out and drink at the really awesome bar up top, but the menu is nothing short of amazing.  I am certain that aside from the two and a half Japanese steakhouses, this is the only other place where you can get fried rice made to order.  The menu is this Asian, Polynisan, American, Fusion with a good atmosphere. Seriously, you can come in with shorts and a t-shirt or in a suit and tie and not feel out of place at any point of the day. I can tell you that General Tso, would be pleased at his favorite meals representation at this establishment, and if you never had elk meatloaf, with the homemade ketchup, then your life is without meaning, and you don’t even know it.

That is just sad.

What about the PRICE?

That is not the point, see if you are going to go eat at any of the above corporate chuck wagons, then you have already allocated the money from your budget to eating out. This money is going to be spent and I am just asking the question: “Why spend it there and not local”

Let’s go back to the waiting line issue.

If you wait outside of here it is because you are stupid not
hungry.

Why would you wait in line at a restaurant when there is better dining options at a comparable price in the same town, this makes no sense to me and I know it makes no sense to restaurant owners in the local community. We tell our kids to try new things, we tell our kids to not be a follower be a leader, to take inititive, and what do we do instead? We stick to our routines, listen to commercials, wait for someone else to tell us what something is like, and we fall for the corporate Okey-doke.

What you do is more important than what you say, so I am saying get out there and eat something new this November.

So this month, I am going to write about how awesome a local restaurant is in my community and share it with the world in hopes that my super awesome diverse readership will forgo restaurants with commercials, download Scoutmob on your smartphones, and spend the money that you are going to spend already at a local spot.

Oh and on a side note, for all you parents out there that are/were on this whole I'm glad it rained on Halloween  cause Halloween is the devil and all that non-sense. I got a conversation for you on the 24 of this month and I am going to finish it up in December.