KenNitro Vs The Facility: Snakes of The Snake Variety

I was driving on the way to work today, and I came to the conclusion that I needed to do something different. It dawned on me that I needed to learn how to do something that I didn't already know how to do.

Pass the buck.

Cause, truth be told, you can pass the buck or get thrown under the bus.

See, that is the subject matter of a soon to be written "Congruency of The Damned" blog(coming soon).

Let me tell you what happened.

So I am coming in the office, doing my end of the night stuff, and I see this thing squirming around on the ground. I was like, "That looks like a snake"

OH SHIT, THAT'S A SNAKE.

This Picture Posted cause Sex Sells

So I ain't even gonna lie, I was half tempted to pick it up and walk it outside, then one of my coworkers say's

"Hey Ken, you know baby snakes are more dangerous than adult snakes cause they will release all their venom at once".

FUCK!

Well there goes my plan.

Then he say's, "Oh, and they can lunge the length of their body"

I started to be like, "Well that's not true", then I realize the punchline to my new favorite joke. 

Wanna hear it?

What's the difference between a person with a contrary attitude and a person with a contrary attitude that is knowledgeable about any given situation? Nothing, they are both douche bags.

Next Level Babysitting Technique

Two of my best ideas are easily the worst idea ever, and you know they say always go with your best idea. 

So I keep calm and dump a hygiene box full of hygine stuff and stack that and cover the snake with it and then place an even heavier bin on top of it. 

Now I can finally think.

I seriously had half a mind to leave all of that in the office and let 3rd or even 1st shift handle it. I mean, it's not like I haven't come to work to have to deal with something that someone else could have taken care of...

Whoa!

Save it for later.

So this little fucker was all kinds of pissed, I mean it was hissing,lunging, doing all kinds of snake shit so I slide the bin and the snake out of my office. After I took a picture of me doing what I just described.

Full Mount on a Snake

Seriously, we live in a world where people document every single aspect of their insignificant lives to share with the world. Tyler Durden said, "You are not a unique snowflower" I am saying that no one cares about the meal you ate at this restaurant that yelp gave "$$$" out of 5. No one cares that you got some drink that is garnished with fruit all pretty like, and you know what ladies

That hand at the hip pose is really, really, getting old.

So, halfway from getting the snake out of "MY" office, I realized that I probably should keep the snake. I mean, I bet if this snake was in my office no one would have stolen my phone charger.

Check those Cocain White
Kicks

Yeah I still feel some sort of way about it. 

Anyway so I finally get the snake almost to the door, and it is actually photo time again. The difference between this one and the last one is that this is my victory pose on this beast. Not to be confused with my conquering pose on the other one. 

I get the snake out of the building, no one gets bit by a pissed off venom filled snake, and I looked good doing it.

After the two weeks I have had, I needed to deal with a regular ol snake in the grass, and not the metaphorical one.

Oh, and I found a video that pretty much sums the entire 25 minute fiasco, I mean...you know I had to do it

Pro Wrestling...it's so Gay Orrrrrr We're Here, We're Queer, First you have to care, then get over it(as it relates to pro wrestling)

So not too long ago, a pro basketball player comes out as being gay, and I think somebody cared. I mean, don't get me wrong, I think it's awesome that he would come out and say to the world, "Hey, I'm into dudes" but you know what I think. 

I think it's just a power move.

Ok, before all you activist start cracking your fingers to type something activey(real word, I just made it up). Think about it. This dude was/is a mediocre basketball player at best. So what do you do when your contract is up and you could be cut and I suppose you got to get back to the real world....

Hell, I would come out the closet too(no homo).

Seriously, who would fire a guy who just came out the closet? Not anybody that wants to have the masses setting up camp in the digital space and form a virtual picket line. So you know what you do, you make the smart move.

Keep them around for a year, and if he can't put points in the paint, trade his ass to the European leagues.

Anyway so tell you the truth, I give two shits about anybody's sexual preference. I could be wrong for that in the short run, but as it relates to pro wrestling...There has been so much "gay" in wrestling since the 40's.

WOOOOOO!

I'm not going to go through the catalog of wrestlers with questionable sexuality, keep in mind by questionable I mean ambiguous. After all, pro wrestling has always been about characters, and a lot of times these characters were maintained more than the real life of the actual person. So in terms of GAY

Oh yeah, pro wrestling is rampant with "Teh Gay"

Take, this guy. Johnie B. Badd was a guy that wore make-up, looked like Little Richard. His finishing move was called, "The Kiss That Don't Miss" and he even had little stickers made of hearts that he would place on downed opponents.

The Genius was another gimmick that while he was not so outwardly flamboyant like Johnnie b. Badd, he was still on the other side of masculine, which in wrestling terms...GAY.

Lady Gaga's Dad

Probably the most notorious gay gimmick had to have been golddust. This guy wore a gold body suit, essentially sexually harassed other wrestlers during the match and his entrance was really, really, really uncomfortable. 

Then you had Chuck and Billy, they took their gimmick to new heights and even had a wedding ceremony. I mean, c'mon this was back in 2002. I mean, watch it. If it was anything, it was progressive. Even the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation got all butt hurt over the situation, by situation they were hoping that Chuck and Billy actually would come out as being gay, but there is two problems. The first being that and actual civic organization honestly thought that their input on an angle would be taken serious, and the second is that Chuck Palumbo and Monty Kipp Sopp(Billy Gunn) were not gay in the first place. Oh you do know wrestling is not...

"Tag Team" Partners For Life

It's still real to me Dammit!!!

Mr. No Days Off

So I say all this to say that Darren Young, "Mr. No Days Off" coming out to TMZ that he is gay is really boring to me. I mean larger outlets didn't want the story, The WWE set up the press conference in the first place, and most importantly

Darren Young, is one step up from a Jobber(you know, the guy that always loses), and the tag team he is in is no where near getting a push for the tag team. In short, the prime time playaz aren't a real factor in the tag team division. So I honestly feel like He came out because he might be getting those walking papers. 

Is that unforgivable?  

Seriously, if he was a even a top mid card guy there would be enough buzz to actually use his sexuality to push him into the top tier, but because he is bottom at best(see what I did right there) he is going to probably win a few house matches and that's about it. I think if he would spend more time working on honing his craft and not telling TMZ, he would have some real job security. No wrestling fan is going to think he is getting black balled by the WWE, because he does not have the actual talent...

You know, like the homie Roderick Strong

Hell, if I were him, I would use it. Pro Wrestling is kind of like southpark in a way, because they can take whatever that is popular in pop culture and turn it into satire real quick. On average it takes a south park episode 2 weeks to be produced, and WWE is live almost 100 days out of the year.

The New Harlem Heat, Said No One
EVER!!!!!

Imagine this, Prime Time Playaz goes through a rough spot, losing a bunch of matches(Hell they already do that), then Titus and Darren are arguing, because Titus feels some sort of way about the fact that he had to find out he was gay through TMZ of all things(putting TMZ over in the process), They split. Darren is on the search for a new tag team partner, and still losing. Titus speaks with a number of superstars and they tell him that it's all good or some shit. Then Darren Young and his no name tag team partner wrestle the shield, the no name guy gets knocked out. Titus comes out the back, hot tags in, and they make the come back, the shield gets disqualified cause Dean Ambrose interferes. The crowd goes wild. Every wrestling fans enjoys a started from the bottom to the top story that does not include John Cena

Realistically, they will never beat the shield head up...see what they did to the ROCK?

It's still real to me dammit

The Lost Art of the Wingman Part Deux: The Mythical Wingwoman

Nowadays people believe anything
they read on the internet.

BOOM!!! We back in here. Ok, if you missed out on the first part you can find it here. Let me start out by saying this:

In all honesty you can substitute the words "Female" and "Wingman" with words like "Easter bunny" and "Santa Claus" and "unicorn"

Cause you know...either way

I would still be talking about something that doesn't exist. 

Yeah I said it.

Seriously, I don't even know why I am going to put 700 and some words to the subject, however, I am going to address then hopefully men around the world will let go of this childish notion that having a woman with you will get you laid by other women faster and more efficiently than a well organized 2 or 3 man team with one single goal in mind. TO WIN!!!! 

What can happen is that other women may find you more attractive when they see you with a female that is also attractive, it's got something to do with women's innate sense of competition and stuff. This goes all the way back to tribal societies and what not. Think about it, back in the day motherfuckers use to go hunting and shit.

They would all work together and take down a water buffalo, lion, wild boar, T-rex, or whatever they could chuck a spear at. The men would show up and share the kill and start embellish stories about how they actually killed whatever that got speared to death with their bare hands.

you speared it, but I chopped it's clavical causing
a heart attack...your spear did some damage too, bro

Women on the other hand gathered berries, nuts, and all kinds of shit and that is what you ate when you didn't have any brontosaurus burgers to eat.

Cave men didn't bring women on the hunt for the same reason that you don't bring women to the bar to pick up chicks.

That shit is confusing?

Seriously, if you show up to any spot with an attractive female on your arm everyone is going to assume you are their with them. Females may give you a second look, but it ain't the "oh, let me go jump his bones cause he got strong 7 with him", it is that judgemental look women have when a chick comes in wearing the wrong kind of .

Fact is, if you are running the Female Wingman you are by yourself out there in the cold. You might have the ability to insert yourself into her group conversation that she will get into with other people, but you still got to put the work in. 

this would have to be real for me to
put a caption under it

The whole idea that this chick is going to walk you into a bar, the two of you have a few drinks and pick another chick and then she walks over and convinces her to go home and do the grown up with you...cause she said so.

No.

Fact is, if you got a chick that is down to go to the bar with you on the regular and she isn't trying to go home with some other dude, but is hanging with you, and your intention is trying to get laid, you might need to adjust your angle cause the answer is right in front of you!!!!

I really don't know how else to put it.

Women will not get you laid.

Women will on the other hand cosign you laying their friends, but even then. 

It's not about you.

The cosign is simply to assure chick 1 that chick 2 isn't going to think she is a slut for going/bringing home you to do the grown-up.

REAL(CLAP)TALK(CLAP)

Ok, so I can't lie. I have been out here field testing my brand and I will say that the female wingman does exist.

Just not the way women or men generally like to believe it.

Female wingmen are not wingmen per se, but a weapon to be deployed at a moments notice that can and will change the direction of battle. Women are tactical nuclear missiles, and the proper deployment of woman as a weapon to "Win" with other women is what separates the men from the boys fellas.

Game CHANGER right here folks

The good news is that women that accept this role, are eager to please because who doesn't feel a sense of accomplishment when they can start of any sentence with, "If it wasn't for me" Also, women are really quick to "bitch Up" with a chick and become BFF's when there is a gender inequality and no competition is happening. That's when the tactical nuke goes off!

You still haven't won, but you do have some more time on the clock cause your double agent BFF has just convinced her to not go home and to hang with her, while she is hanging with you, so you can put her in a position to cosign any behavior.

"Planning this shit all day? I been planning this shit all WEEK"(name the movie, and actor)

Not for nothing, "doesn't matter still had sex" is still the one line that sums up any damable situation that ended in sex, but there is a difference between "Pitty" sex and "Winning" sex

I mean, doesn't matter still had sex...I'm just saying.

Halal No you didn’t or…This little piggy got GOT!!!!

I saw some shit online that was epic. I mean normally my Tuesdays are always about epic mealtime and getting having some sort of fun while waiting on church night with my peoples(church is a metaphor). Now my nights may not always be epic, but they do always start with dinner.

Generally, dinner is either pizza or sushi(not at the same time). It’s quick, easy, and with pizza I generally have some food left for the post drinking action or maybe even the next day.

The Best Weaves are Made of Bacon

Tonight is something different.

I saw this thing on youtube called the  “bacon explosion” it is basically a heart attack wrapped in bacon,

And I need this in my life.

Get Creative, Next Time I am Using More
Sausage.

So I went to the grocery jump off and got me some bacon, I went and spent a little bit of bread on it and got the thick cut. I think that was best decision.  Actually making the bacon weave was pretty easy, I was surprised at how easy it was to get this sexy thing made. If you don’t like the way pork looks I don’t know what to tell you.

Now, the next part opens up the lane for some personal decision making. Some people call for 2lbs of sausage or a kilo if you aren’t from ‘Merica(Pew Pew Pew Pew). I live by myself so I figured a pound of sausage is enough for me. I once ate a pound of deer sausage and was not even the slightest bit apologetic.

No homo.

The youtube video calls for some bbq seasoning, but you know I was kinda gentle with it. I mean, there is a

lot of salt in this monstrosity. I then added some cheese cause…well I can’t think of any situation where cheese and or a fried egg is a bad idea so there you go.

Sleep, So You Shall Be PERFECT

Then I put that bitch in the oven.

I got some bread for the delivery device. I figure regular bread just won’t due. In the video they had some can biscuits, but I can’t lie

I don’t do can biscuits….

Seriously, I mean if you put them in front of me and I don’t have any other options, I will eat them. I mean, if you are cooking me breakfast and you make them, I will eat them. I mean, I ain’t gonna throw them shits on the floor and be like, “Biiiiitttcccch, you tryin’ to catch a beat down”.  

The fucked up part is that I can’t make a biscuit to save yo life.

Fact is, if someone put a gun to your head and was like, “KenNitro, if you want to save this , you gonna have to make some serious biscuits!!!

You a dead muthafucka.

Anywhoo, this is my dinner tonight. I know you are jealous. I know you are all planning on making this around the world.

That'll do Pig, That'll do

Lost Art of The Wingman Part 1: Do You Even Know What a Wingman is, Bro?

Whatever you do, DO SOMETHING!

Navigating the dating scene is like having a compass in the dark with no flashlight. There are so many different ways you can go about WINNING, one can be confused about which right way is the best way. One thing remains true, from human’s humble beginnings in caves to massive multiplayer online games

Teamwork makes the dream work.

There was a time when two bro’s could hit the scene and get all the cream there was to get, and high five the entire time. There was a time where men would run defense so their bro could make a play. The wingman was more than just situational, it was an honor. That’s shit over, charge it to the game. One of the greatest acts of wingmaning ever caught on film was this scene right here.

See, this right here is what it is all about. I'll be damned if Five doesn't get you Ten with teamwork like that.

So how did we lose the art of the wingman?

I’ll tell you when, we lost the art when men decided to use the phrase “bro’s before hoe’s” as just a phrase and not a part of the code of ethics governing male bonding rituals and appropriate man to man relationships. For instance,

There is real magic in this phrase.

if you invoke bro’s before hoe’s just because you as a man are jealous of your homey’s situation with his lady, you’re doing it wrong bro. If you are invoking bro’s before hoe’s because you are gravy in your situation and you just don’t like the chick your homey is kicking it with, you’re doing it wrong bro. If you being offensive to chicks your homey brings around, and then he stops bringing them around, and you invoke bro’s before hoe’s

You guessed it, you’re doing it wrong.

self explaintory

See, the above mentioned is hating.  Hating has become such an epidemic in our society that we have begun to think that we need haters in our lives to validate the fact that we are livin!

What kind of shit is that?

But I digress, a brotha dealing with some other shit these days.

Anyway

When did it become cool for a man to break in on someone else’s program over a chick in the first place? When was it ok for a man to offer up info on another man that is going to adversely affect his pimpin? I don’t know, I can’t even call it.

Hell man, with that kind of heat in your circle I can see how individuals start backing away from the code and doing work on their own all together.  Then of course, women in the media are always trying to play up the whole, “confidence” factor. Coming up with new ways of approaching women that all go in this direction

See a chick you like, roll up on them, hit’em with some sort of line. The line varies depending on a number of variables. Then if that works you invite them on some sort of no pressure excursion and hopefully, it works out for you.( ß 60 % of the time it works 100%)

See, the thing is women are already up on game.

It Can Be Done, But It Ain't No Fun...

Women rarely roll solo, and if they do, there is some wishy ass dude waiting on stand-by ready to get fish hooked to stop your advance. Gone are the days of being able to show up in the spot and pull chicks that you don’t know out of their situations and into yours without some help from your wingman.  Your wingman was your bro. Your Billy to his Jimmy lee, Han Solo and Chewbacca, Beautiful Bobby Eaton and Sweet Stan Lane, your success was his success and the reverse is also correct.

One Of the Best EVA!!!

Wingman skill sets  can come in different varieties, but the fact is that somewhere on this trip men collectively decided that it would be better to get a laugh out of seeing our bro’s fail instead of making the dream work. That’s just a damn shame, and we all know someone that is that guy.

So let’s get started, but let’s work in reverse for a second and go over what wingman-ing isn’t. It is just as important to know “What it ain’t” as well as “what it is” ya dig?

First, it ain’t the wingman’s job to bring you the pussy, and put it on your plate. Many a dudes have come up asking me to hook them up with some chicks, just like that.

“Hey Ken, can you hook me up with some chicks?”

Get the fuck outta here with that shit! Dudes these days are under the impression that chicks are just DTF off the rip(down to fuck for the uninformed).  News flash, just cause your mans ‘andem got it like that with a crew of females does not mean that they are down to fuck at a drop of a dime or  more importantly, that they are down to fuck YOU at a drop of a dime. Take yo thirsty ass elsewhere with that.

And even if they were and did, they not inviting you to the party for the simple fact that you’re asking to come.

Second, a wingman is not your bomb dismantling device. This can be a little confusing, see there is a difference between your homeboy backing your play on the double date and you knowingly knowing that the chicks friend is the B.U.F.F.*

This is BROTHERHOOD

See, you wrong for that! With holding info is already not the move, expecting your homeboy to stick around after there has been visual confirmation on the BUFF, you asking for too much. To blame your homeboy cause you didn’t get laid, because he didn’t keep some B.U.F.F occupied, you need to have ya ass beat.

Twice.

Now if you told your wingman that this was the deal and he ends up in a situation with a B.U.F.F that he can’t get out of well…that’s why we have man night, to laugh and talk about such things!

Third, the wingman is not your whipping boy. This pisses me off more than unknowingly being placed in the  bomb dismantler position. See, after the fact, bomb dismantling is fun. Hell if you roll with a crew of folks and if you all don't have a story that y'all laugh about involving "Taking One For The Team", "Diving on Grenades" and so forth and so on, I may have to call shenanigans on the existence of you all as a crew all together. 

See what you have to understand is this,hating on your homeboy in an effort to make yourself look like a BOSS in front of some chick/s, is the utter definition of a DICK MOVE.  Don’t get me wrong, the story about how your homeboy bent a fat chick over and went to town during karaoke or even the same homeboy letting fat chicks rub all over his chest at karaoke while singing “I want you to want me", being told is ok. Why is that shit is ok? Cause it is funny before it is offensive, and as long as he is laughing you haven’t crossed any lines. 

What is not and by not I mean never ok is making your homeboy look bad or set him up for the okey doke so you can appear to be clever. 

  For instance, there was this one night where me and some people were out and about. This dude was trying so hard to get these chicks to notice him, he actually resorted to asking me questions just to cut me off and throw it back to the chick that wasn't interested in him in the first place to answer, acting as though he valued her opinion so much as to cut off your's truly!!!!!

 As if she would be impressed at a man’s ability to be a DICK.

FUCKOUTTAHEREWITDAT SON!!!!

Can't Win If You Don't Play

Now I’m sure I can go even further and establish some other behaviors, but you get the point. Fact is even if you have a wingman, you still got to get into the fight, you still have to acquire your target, and you have to take a shot.

Otherwise your wingman is going to hit you with a reversal.

While we can talk about what being a wingman’s job isn’t all day long. Sometimes your wingman is doing too much. Doing too much is a lot like not doing anything at all, because it will all achieve the same outcome.

FAILURE

A wingman that is doing too much is not THE MOVE at all.

It's Only Cool For a Second

When a wingman is doing too much, it looks more like competition than co-operation. They start to think of how they can get ahead instead of how we can all win. Now, I am not going to sit here and say that I have never competed against another man or men for a woman, I am not even saying that I will not in the future. What I am saying is that if you and a man that you would call brother are competing over the same chick, you all both run the serious risk of losing everything, all at once. On top of all that, the both of you end up giving this chick the big head. See, every woman was to be competed over, but no woman wants to be some  prize to be won. So you start competing in public with your bro, you both will lose, and she will be queen of sheba...at least for the night.

This is just going to get your feet wet, part two we are going to look at what makes a good wingman, and some factors to consider, and we will touch base on the "fabled female wingman" or would it be a "wingperson". Hell to be honest, when did men need other women to pick up women in the first place? 

Oh, so if you are into the other elements of social media add me on instagram @KenNitro.

*B.U.F.F. is a term I picked up from a female friend of mind that means “Butt Ugly Fat Friend”. Don’t get mad at me, women are always supporting each other when I am talking shit, so if a chick tells me some shit that is degrading to women on any level, I am taking it and running with it.

KenNitro Vs. The Facility: I Can Do This All Day or HATERS MAKE ME FAMOUS

So I wrote a blog…and what happened is that someone at the facility felt some sort of way about it. Personally, I don’t care. Let me say it again,

I don’t care.

Oh if you are new to this little slice of the interweb you can find the blog in question in its entirety here*

Anyway, so I wrote this blog back in February, and everything that I wrote all the way up to when I hit the post button, was some of the realest shit I ever wrote. What I did not take into consideration was that eyes were watching.

I don’t care.

Got to let your next move be
ya best move!

See, but what is interesting is that I was made an offer that I couldn’t refuse. I remember speaking with my Big Brother and Mentor, Dr. Octagon about the change in my work situation, and he was like, “I want to congratulate you, but you don’t seem excited.  At the time, I was apprehensive to be excited. So we just settled on being happy that we were making some more money.  I mean, more money is better than money, and money is better than no money. 

This was in March.

Now, I will admit I haven’t posted anything since February for a few reasons, which I will get into later, but the prominent one was that I knew I was going to have to readjust my writing style as it concerns the facility. With a shake of a hand, and stroke of a pen, KenNitro was catapulted to a new high,

And the haters had not only fired off their first rounds, but they had reloaded.

At the time, I hadn’t even got into this new mode yet, and the whisper campaign had already begun.  Some people I knew ahead of time, were out to get me.

Well, folks may say, “Ken, do these folks really have that much of a hard on for you, and your destruction?”

My response would be, “Go and ask them, and when you tell me, we will both know”, but the thing is

I don’t care.

So, while I was settling into this new vehicle that I am driving I got an email, from the “Man Behind The Curtain” Scott Merrit Himself. This was strange, I rarely speak to the man, and now I am getting an email, about a meeting, that none one else knows about.

Yeah right, people knew, but for some reason telling me what subject of the meeting was about before I go had to have been punishable by death or listening to justin beiber. I hold none of my (direct)bosses, at fault, after all, you were doing what you were told.

So, I get to the jump off and here I am sitting across from “The Man Himself” and we just sat there.

Now I can’t tell you what was on his mind, but I can tell you what I did.

I read the room.

Dude’s desk looks like organized confusion, while I am sure he knows where and what everything is, so I can’t figure out what he is wanting to talk with me about, but he got right into it.

“Ken, I read your blog”

My response was genuine, “Which one?”

It was this one here.

To be honest, I don’t think he actually cared about my blog. Too be honest, I don’t think my blog was even on his radar, until one of the haters put him on to it. Even then, from the time that I posted the blog to the time that he and I sat down to have a chat about it was almost two months.

Two months.

I See You Lookin

I am going to go out on a limb and say that, “The Boss of All Bosses” has other shit to do with his day besides read my blog.

Unlike some of his underlings, they are probably reading this right now :-)

So as we speak, I realize that not only does he not care, but he is really speaking to me because other folks keep running and telling. I can imagine the conversation goes something like this:

BOSS: Yes, what is it now?

Hater: Ken…He’s doing it again!!!

BOSS: Doing what?

Hater: He writin’bout , but he dont call it that, he calls it the facility!

BOSS: Ok

Hater: Annnnd, he be talkin bout work! He be talkin all about work!!!

BOSS: Well does he mention anyone by name?

Hater: Naww, but he be changin’um

BOSS: Does he talk about any work related incidents?

Hater: Yeah, YEAH, he be talkin bout work all the time, but.. I’s not real sure bout what he be talkin bout

BOSS: I don’t care.

I understand his position, see he has these bitch as haters that run tell that, and him not caring isn’t good enough for these bitch ass haters, these bitch ass haters start running their pie holes and this meeting was less about me and my blog and more about him addressing it with me so he can tell these bitch ass haters to fall back.

So he can get some real work done.

We sat and talked for about an hour, about my blog in general, the blog in question, and how I was adjusting to life on the otherside.

Haters, you played your best and it wasn’t good enough. I suppose you  were hoping I would get my feelings hurt, or maybe get a verbal beat down. Possibly a re-enactment of this scene here

I am not going to lie, I wouldn't be upset at all if this scene was re-enacted.

We all know that you people would not be satisfied with that, to satisfy the blood lust of these harpies one needs something more physical they would be pleased as pie if it was this!

HAHAHAAHAHA

I am laughing cause it's true. This is really what they want. It's no fun if you never see'em sweat right? See the thing is, none of the above happened. Not even close. That's why I haven't posted anything until now and even then I am still talking about this right here

My blog is not going anywhere, the previous one is staying up in it's entirety, you can troll my facebook, you can request all the friendships, use other peoples logins, hell you can even call up ex girlfriends for the dirt. COME AT ME BRO!!!!

I don't care.

This above interview pretty much how I see myself dealing with any of you, if any of you were actually bold enough to make yourself known.

Instead of accepting defeat, you just tried harder. Which demonstrates more of your desperation than your will to win, keep in mind,

I don’t care.

I did on the other hand post a challenge, to further demonstrate how bitch ass, these bitch ass haters are. This is what was on my facebook page on may 3^rd

"...Ken whats up with all the hater statuses?..." I got asked that today. My response is that the haters/groupies/malcontents or whatever you want to call them do not rest. for instance, I get pulled to the side because one of you Facility folks has a problem with my ode to the tv show hell on wheels, get a life. Seriously, I will buy you lunch if you man up and reveal your identity in a PM. HELL I WILL CUT MY HAIR, if you post in the comment section who you are and let the world see who it is. Come at me bro!”

Look at that, I call them out, I give them a chance to attain IMMORTALITY, as the individual that made me cut my hair. Hell, they looked to get lunch and LEGENDARY status, all in one swoop. All they had to do was step out into the light. They did none of the sort, as I expected.

Coward(s). I know you are not alone.

The best part is that I know who you are.

And when one of the rank and file told me your name, I laughed, mainly because I was not surprised. Hell, it would almost be funny, if you were not so sad in the first place. I leave you with a quote from one of the greatest martial artist ever.

"Death comes for us all...but when you die it will be something much worse comes for you, for when you die, it will be without honor" Master Hamato Yoshi(see what I did right there)

So please, continue your campaign.  I don’t care. Run and tell everything. I don’t care.

Yours Truly,

“The Walkin’ Boss” KenNitro.

KenNitro Vs The FACILITY: Are You Hupping Kidding Me!!!!

KenNitro vs THE FACILITY: The First and Only Qualification

Okay, before I even get into this.  I do not hold my BRO(inside title) in any way accountable for this. I said this before and I am saying this again, we both applied for a job, and only one of us could get hired for it. Like I said earlier, nothing that I have to say is posted directly at you. Personally, I think you are nothing short of amazing, and I hope you can compartmentalize this blog for what it is, and not for what it ain’t, and that’s you.

Seriously, this is not about you. I mean this in the most sincere way. I hope you understand this, you are too awesome to not be my friend, but I have to write this and not apologize for it.

Otherwise, I would not be KenNitro.

Well, lets get to it.

Last time I wrote about work, it was all about just getting shit off my chest that was keeping me from writing about the normal human dynamic, misogynistic, it is what it is, adventures that I have, codify and give back to you. I hate that I am going back to such a boring topic as my job, but all I have to say is that this shit is…hell I really don’t have a word to describe how I feel.

So let me start with what this blog is not about.

It is not about the KIDS and the how I affect them on the daily. See that is not even questionable, the fact that I make Gangsta Disciples, Piru, and Peoples Nations members all go to bed at 8:30pm without having to dump them on their heads is a testament to me and the team that I work with. Talking to me about how regardless about how I feel about how I am treated as an ASSOCIATE at the FACILITY has NOTHING to do with the KIDS, means you are missing the bigger picture so what I am talking about right now is not about the kids or how Mr. Ken deals interacts with the kids but how

ADULTS ACT AT THE FACILITY

And how that affects me.

I just recently applied for a job as a Teacher’s Assistant at the Facility, a job that I was more than qualified for, more than capable, and defiantly ready to work for. On paper I defeated all under heaven and above hell. In theory, I defeated all under heaven and above hell for the job. In reality, well…that is where shit gets all fucked up.

See, this was easily the best Interview I had at the FACILITY, The decision maker and I spoke for a hot second about everything concerning me and the job, what I look for in a supervisor, what makes me happy and when I think about it, that is about it. She had an informal interview style, which was fine because I already have a job at the facility. My work history, ethic, and overall awesomeness should be enough to do the talking for me. Let’s check the ballistics G, I have almost three years in mental health, a college degree, and over one thousand hours teaching in an actual classroom environment. Inside of those three years in mental health at THE FACILITY, I have been an integral component to two teams that essentially took back units from clients due to lack of leadership I have a positive rapport with all clients, a positive rapport with all staff that I work with on a daily basis. I mean, there are folks out there that don’t care for me, but that has nothing to do with me.

STOP

Let me speak on this for a second.

It is not that I just get along with the people that I work with, but there is not a shift at the FACILITY that if my name was on, other associates don’t get a confidence boost from. They don’t say, “Oh man, I got to work with him, geez he really sucks”. I make a real effort to build up everyone around me so that they do not have to rely on me when I am working with them, and that they have the confidence to run shit when I am not there.

Tell you the truth, I am like the 4^th person that gets put in a leadership position behind the full time people that I work with. That is not indicative of my ability to lead, just a technicality. Hell, the asterisk next to your name is really the decision of the Good King Gary Russell. In reality, all that means is that you are in charge of giving out medication and group notes…and doing the email. Truth be told, there is no one that I work with that steps on my toes whenever I jump out there to run ship. That’s because I know what I am doing and they(meaning the people that I work with) know that I know that they know that I know what I am doing, and they are happy for it. Hell even in the collective funk that I have been in over this recent travesty I am still effective on the unit, and I have not even raised my voice past a normal tone in two weeks.

But wait Kenneth,

If you are all these things, what is keeping you from moving around to other departments? Why is it that you can’t seem to break out of department you are in when it seems as though everyone else can apply, interview and move with ease?

Good question.

See I have asked myself, others, and to tell you the truth, I get a lot of speculation. One person has said that Eric Banks(the former program manager)would ask that other departments look elsewhere besides the Childcare Worker II’s when it comes to hiring people. That reason was that it was so difficult to hire, train, and then keep competent people in direct care, so for the sake of consistency in these kids lives, don’t hire from this group.

I have also heard that the move is to always keep the stronger staff on the unit and essentially push the weaker staff to other areas.

All of this is on the macro scale. Let’s talk about me.

Aside from not getting hired for any job at the facility other than the one I have, I have also never received any FEEDBACK. I think this is really important part of the interview process. I mean, I understand if I don’t get hired for a job, but as a potential employer, I think that giving feedback is  not only courteous, but the right thing to do, If you want to be professional about it. I brought this up in my interview and the person doing the interview assured me that they have no problems giving me feedback.

 So the day came and I got the phone call. It basically went like this:

Me: Hey insert name here

Them: How’s it going

Me: Pretty good…

Them: Well, I just wanted to call and tell you that I have made a decision on the TA position and I have decided to go with another client

Me: Oh. Well Okay

Insert awkward silence

See what was supposed to happen was that I was suppose to say, “What! Who!!! Who did you hire?” which would have in turn put the other person on the defensive. Which is probably how they were prepared to deal with me in the first place, but the silence is one of those make or break things. So I was asked to find them so we could talk about some of the obstacles that I had.

Awesome.

The way I looked at it, I would at least know what I needed to do in the future. So I went into this post job interview debriefing with an open mind. In the end this is going to help me right?

It essentially boiled down to three things, that kept me from getting this particular job, that I was and in my opinion still the most qualified for.

1.      My hair.

Wow, you work a job for almost three years and my hair is still an issue. If my hair is too much for Scott Merritt to deal with I don’t know what to tell you, even though he is rarely seen engaging any employees in any capacity aside from the associates awards ceremony where he shakes your hand. The only reason that I am even dropping his name is because folks want to tip toe around his name when they are speaking on my Afro. I mean, I don’t want to throw the word discrimination around, but it is what it is.

2.      There is a concern that I may leave for a bigger, better, deal.

This is dirty pool by anyone’s standards. How can you not hire me based on the possibility that I might leave for another job that is better? How can you not hire anyone based on that period? How can you hold the desire to grow and better yourself financially against anyone? I bet if I asked anyone, anywhere in the world, if they would leave there job for a bigger, better, deal, they would. It was mentioned that I have talked about going back to Korea to teach English in the past, and that is true. I bet if you asked me when, it was probably after I applied for a job that I was qualified for and was looked over, I can name about 4 times for sure I have looked at returning to asia as a real option for me.

3.      You have not gone full time.

This is always a fun one, because this is always used in conjunction with questioning my commitment to the job. Now, granted I understand that the perception of part-time associates at the facility has not always been the most positive, but once again, that has nothing to do with me. Check the schedules; see how many weeks I have worked forty hours. Check that against the number of times I have called out or no-showed a shift. Now how does my current status as a part-time employee affect my desire to move to a full-time position in another department effect one another?

What has been consistent in my time at the facility is that there is something about me being flex and not full time on the unit that seems to bother people. I don’t understand because I work full time hours anyway. I really do need to ask the person that was hired, if they ever brought up the fact that she never worked the unit. I mean, it seems to be so important to some people that I work full time on the unit in order to move around, I just wonder if this is the general consensus?

There was also this point where the interviewer clearly misunderstood my desire to improve my environment as, “Ken does what he wants, when he wants”. I was really taken back by that due to the fact that I go out of my way to be a team player. I was like, huh? and she was like, “well you said in your interview that you like to change things”. I said yes, I like to go into any situation and observe how things are done and when given an appropriate opportunity,  I will raise my hand and offer a suggestion that may improve the situation for all parties involved. Her response was, “Well some people don’t deal with changes to things very well”. I totally understand that, and my response was “ but a good idea is a good idea and  it is not change that is either good or bad, but how people deal with it” at this point we were in agreement.

The best part was when I was almost called cocky, but there was that small break in the sentence before it was replaced with the word confident, as if I didn't pick up what was being put down.

Stop.

I will be the first person to admit that I not only enjoy talking shit but I am good at it a good part of my conversation with close friends is one of mostly shit talking. I mean, if me and my collective crews aren’t talking shit to each other, we are talking shit about someone loud enough for them to hear us.

Start.

What happened in this moment was not an issue of me being cocky. This was in my opinion a person’s issue with my level of confidence as it directly relates to my ability to do a job. Even then, it is not even about the job. It really came down to if the person sitting on the other side of the desk personal ability to supervise me, or at least their perception of their ability to supervise me.

Fact is, none of the reasons that I was given as to why I was not hired for this Teachers Aide position had anything to do with anything tangible, it’s all bullshit.

I do hope that this kind of stuff changes. I have been mishandled several times at the facility, and I do not think I can work there any longer than I have too. I am too intelligent to allow myself to be treated this way.  At this point, applying for any job at the facility is a guarantee that someone else will get hired.